My Story

Last Equals Lost

An empathetic soul is life’s gift and challenge. When others are in need you drop it all in the pursuit of helping out. Noble yes, healthy no.

When I began my quest to get my mojo back (I called it survival) I had suffered a devastating job loss. Add to that, being a single mom with two sons I supported and a weight problem that had become…sizable.

During this scary transition I started to lose multiple family members to cancer and Alzheimer’s. It seemed with each step forward there was another reality check. All of this affected my own health as I tried my best to be there for others. It brought me back to the time I was going through a tough divorce, losing my home, and nearly losing one of my sons to an unforeseen health crisis. I recalled how my own health suffered and I had somehow lost the person I could count on to get me through (myself).

What to do?

I decided to not totally disappear this time but looked for like-minded women who I felt had it “together.” I networked, I wrote, I joined communities and I started my own business, The Humane Marketer, after taking courses and completing a mini-MBA. (That was a frightening leap of faith). I discovered that like-minded women were also dealing with challenges of their own. The difference was that some of us were putting our needs last and some had a healthier view that being attentive to your mind and body was a much better way to move forward.

One of the groups I joined was called So Do It! and the women I met there were looking for some support, impetus, inspiration and conversation to start, or restart, things that were important to them. I had multiple seasons with So Do It! where I got my novel moving again, started a weight loss journey that is successful to this day, returned to my performing roots to feed my soul and simply, put my own needs forward without any guilt attached.

Another group I have been a part of for many years is Women in Networking. It has another amazing cadre of women who are interested in the greater good for each other. One of the offshoots has been 50 Fun Things which encourages us to keep joy in our lives by making time for fun, adventure and exploration – no matter how large or small.

You have probably heard of the saying ‘give yourself tough love.” But it is the love part of that intention which often gets left out. We willingly talk brutally to ourselves! Something we would never do to a friend.

When you are most fragile the “shake it off and be a big girl” attitude only goes so far. It sets you up to fail because you are in isolation trying to make things happen in a community-centric world.

For anyone on the mojo journey, my suggestion is to look for the ONE THING that is in your power to change.

To dive into the pool you need a sturdy platform. It can be as simple as getting more sleep or decluttering your home. No act is too small to start a revolution. There are times when you feel so lost because very little seems to be in our own hands. Look for the one thing that is in your power to change and make that your priority.

Make you your priority.